Critique My End User Sales Letter and Plan


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In the next few days I am going to try and pitch my domain B-u-y-A-n-E-s-s-a-y-.c-o-m (remove hyphens) to end users. I am going to be doing this via email first. I have set a small site on the domain to see if that makes a difference in the process.

If you search for the domains keywords you will see that there are tons of potential end users with domain names that are not .com or are hard to remember. I think that the domain is a great brand name and perfect for an essay company.

Here is my pitch so far

hey company.....
My name is Brian Diener and I am the owner of the website B-u-y-A-n-E-s-s-a-y-.c-o-m. I did a google search and found out that your website also sells essays.
B-u-y-A-n-E-s-s-a-y-.c-o-m is the perfect name for an essay website. There are so many competitors in the essay writing area that you need a name that describes what you do and is easy to remember and advertise. The name brands itself. When people see and visit B-u-y-A-n-E-s-s-a-y-.c-o-m they know exactly what they are going to do, Buy An Essay!
A professional name like B-u-y-A-n-E-s-s-a-y-.c-o-m sets you apart from your competition.
I am offering this domain for sale to multiple companies, if you are interested in purchasing the website please let me know.
Thanks

I think I am not going to include the  price in the email just to gauge how many people respond, but what do you with a fair price is?

If the emails do not work I will try calls later on. I like that there are so many possible end users and I think it is a strong name.

What do you think of my end user plan and sales email?

Related posts:

  1. The Perfect End User Letter (Well it’s a Work in Progress)
  2. Help Pricing a Domain For End User Sale
  3. Sample End User Domain Sales Call Transcript

Comments

4 Responses to “Critique My End User Sales Letter and Plan”

  1. Leonard Britt
    February 28th, 2011 @ 11:13 am

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    The fact that you have a lead gen form on the domain is OK and shows some knowledge of development. However, given you currently have no means of fulfillment, I believe it is somewhat misleading to describe it in a sales letter as a website. I agree it is best to leave the price out as that assures price was not the issue. If interested, they will respond, “How much?” For the right end user, I believe it is a decent name BUY X & .COM. Good luck!

  2. TeenDomainer
    February 28th, 2011 @ 1:33 pm

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    Thanks for the advice!

  3. John Humphrey
    March 2nd, 2011 @ 4:42 am

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    The hyphens in the sales letter confused me as I have seen domains like that for sale on Ebay!

  4. TeenDomainer
    March 2nd, 2011 @ 6:11 am

    Warning: Illegal string offset 'keywords_time' in /home1/theman37/public_html/teendomainer.com/wp-content/plugins/internal_link_building.php_/internal_link_building.php on line 103

    @ John the hyphens are only there so the name does not get indexed in google, remove them and find the real domain!

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